He Wants Kids, But Not With Me
“Kloudiia
Hello my name is S I am from South carolina. I am in love with a man who do not have kids. I cannot have any. Lately here I found out he do not love me. And that hurt me a lot. I love him dearly. He says he love me. But not in love with me. But my thing is. He wants a child. So that love what he got for me that bond of a woman is not there for me. I think he is go out to get him a child from somewhere else. I can not handle that. He do not really want to leave me. And I really do not want to lose him. But by going out making a baby is not fair to me. Sometimes he does not even come home at night. My heart can not handle all of this. I am going though so much with him. I just do not know what to do. Because I do love him.:sad:” - S
Dear S
You must be going through an emotional torture now. As a woman, to accept the fact that you cannot bear any child is already a tough one. Now, you need to handle one additional heartache of your partner seeking another woman’s help to bear him a child. Gosh, how tired you must be feeling now!
I’d like to give you a big hug for hanging on there, for the sake of love.
How about compromising on a solution together? Have you guys thought of adoption? By adopting, you merely skipped the first part (which is pregnancy) but you will be going through the more challenging, but definitely rewarding, part of bringing the children up together as parents. Bring this idea up to him and see how he react.
Being together is to create a common experience as a couple. You are there for each other, and with each other. If for any reason one party stops being there, then effectively the relationship has ceased to be present. Sacrifices are inevitable. So, is he willing to build a life together with you without your own kids? Can he see that as another type of relationship, though “fruitless” but still can be extremely fruitful and fulfilling?
Ultimately, you hold the key to the type of relationship you want in your life. Monogamy is one factor that we fiercely fight to uphold. If he is not able to see eye to eye with you on this, then is he the right man for you who will walk with you till the end of days?
Give this a good thought S. If you need more assistance to go through this patch and to move on, I’ll be here to work with you via our coaching programme. Please feel free to contact me anytime.
All the best to you. Pray for peace, strength and courage. You’ll need that.
Love, Kloudiia
Technorati Tags: having babies, family and parenting, monogamy, boyfriend, girlfriend, partner
